Okay, I might have a bit of an unhealthy love for acronyms. But I'm sure it's not a problem with any of you.
So...as some of you may know, I was at the Romantic Times Booklovers' Convention last week (RT for short). RT is always an interesting trip because you can never be quite sure who you're going to meet or what opportunities are going to be presented to you.
One thing I did know going in was that I would meet a bunch of the people from Entangled Publishing since they signed quite a bit of my adult stuff recently. And boy, did I! RT is one of those places where it sucks to have a brain like mine, because I will remember your face forever, but I have a horrible time with names. Anyway, I digress...
On the last day of RT, I was having lunch with a certain YA author, and this anthology idea came up. We talked about it and tweaked it and apparently we're going to try to make the thing happen. I'm beyond excited, not only for the opportunity to work with her but also for the chance to re-awaken this me. It's been too long since I've actively done anything that wasn't adult. I miss YA like crazy. So, keep your fingers crossed!
In the meantime, I have adult books to write and a house to sell and all sorts of craziness to participate in. I promise to keep you posted on any and all YA news I have to share though!
*happy post-con hugs all around*
Blogging home of Julie Particka ~*~ Author of speculative young adult fiction ~*~ Climbing out of Hell one fight at a time
Thursday, May 9, 2013
RT FTW!
Labels:
anthology,
entangled publishing,
Romantic Times,
Romantic Times Booklovers' Convention,
RT,
YA,
young adult
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Kids and Coping
My kids' lives are in upheaval right now. For starters, we're moving in a few months. They're leaving all their friends and school and everything behind to move to a smaller, older house...closer to cousins, but that's about it as far as they're concerned. They're also dealing with the fact that my father is going through chemotherapy right now, and while my son knows what cancer is, he doesn't really "get it." And there are other things in the mix too. As I was told recently, we're dealing with like three of the top ten stressors a person can go through in their life.
And my kids are, so far, taking it all in stride. There have been some questions, of course, but I think the answers to the ones they've asked have helped them to understand some of the ones they didn't know how to ask. The best part though? They are excited about the move and new bedrooms and decorating and swimming at their aunt's this summer.
That right there is something that I often feel is missing from books about kids/teens. Yes, some kids will kick and scream and gnash their teeth at any change, but others...roll with the punches better than anyone could ever expect. And I say that as the mother of an autistic child--you know, the kid who isn't supposed to deal with change...at all.
The difficult thing is on the odd occasion I see kids like that in books, they aren't consistent. Harry is fine with being a wizard, but is shocked at the moving staircases. Whereas the kids who have always known about Hogwarts oooed and ahhhed the staircases too. One of my editors spoke to me recently about her biggest pet peeve, and it's basically that--when a character does something that goes against all the character building done up to the moment of the scene. Consistency is important to readers because even when people act differently than normal, it's usually still within the realm of their nature.
As for my kids and how they're dealing? I was happily surprised that it wasn't a moment that when against their character. They've always been the type to look for and find silver linings. I think with all the dark this time, fictional characters had prepared me for mine to lose that ability. I thank my lucky stars that didn't happen.
And my kids are, so far, taking it all in stride. There have been some questions, of course, but I think the answers to the ones they've asked have helped them to understand some of the ones they didn't know how to ask. The best part though? They are excited about the move and new bedrooms and decorating and swimming at their aunt's this summer.
That right there is something that I often feel is missing from books about kids/teens. Yes, some kids will kick and scream and gnash their teeth at any change, but others...roll with the punches better than anyone could ever expect. And I say that as the mother of an autistic child--you know, the kid who isn't supposed to deal with change...at all.
The difficult thing is on the odd occasion I see kids like that in books, they aren't consistent. Harry is fine with being a wizard, but is shocked at the moving staircases. Whereas the kids who have always known about Hogwarts oooed and ahhhed the staircases too. One of my editors spoke to me recently about her biggest pet peeve, and it's basically that--when a character does something that goes against all the character building done up to the moment of the scene. Consistency is important to readers because even when people act differently than normal, it's usually still within the realm of their nature.
As for my kids and how they're dealing? I was happily surprised that it wasn't a moment that when against their character. They've always been the type to look for and find silver linings. I think with all the dark this time, fictional characters had prepared me for mine to lose that ability. I thank my lucky stars that didn't happen.
Labels:
autism,
changes,
consistency,
kids,
personality,
reader expectations,
stress,
upheaval
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Age Group Jumping
There are two of me. One writes adult and the other writes YA/NA. There's a simple reason why I write all three. I am an adult (and quite frankly, that stuff sells better digitally) and I loved high school and college. That was a great age for me, so I'm drawn to writing it.
Much to my children's sorrow, I will not write middle grade or chapter books. It's not anything weird like a lack of respect for the genre. I am HUGELY appreciative of those categories because those are the books that make lifelong readers. Problem is, I didn't come into my own until high school, and I don't look back on the earlier years with any fondness. If someone said to me "Hey, we're going to make you twelve again and you can live your whole life over!" My response would be "No thanks, I'd rather choke on my own panicked vomit and die." Plus, quite honestly, I don't have the right voice for it.
There are people who can bridge from picture books all the way to adult and do it all well, but they are few and far between. It always makes me shake my head when I see writer friends/acquaintances who seem to jump on whatever the "it" genre is.
"MG is hot? I'm going to write that!"
"NA is the new thing. Sign me up."
Now, anyone who knows me knows I'm all about trying new things and stretching as a writer, but if the reason you're doing it is because it's popular, you're doing it for the wrong reasons. It's like dating the captain of the football team in high school even though he's a misogynistic creep who never bothers to comb his hair or brush his teeth. Hey, he's still football captain. Hello...popular.
Hello... lame... stupid... ridiculous. (Pick an adjective.)
So is chasing the "it" genre. By all means, if it calls to your muse and fits your voice, have at it. But if you're just doing it because it's popular...
Do you know why I write (some) New Adult? Because I love writing YA, and some of my YA has always nudged into the college arena (I was told at the time it was unsellable). I also write adult, but I've been told I have a "youthful" adult voice. (Appropriate since Julie means youthful.) So that sweet spot for me? It's 16-25. Yes, I've written older characters, but that (even with my adult stuff) is where I like to sit. I'm just lucky enough that it crosses three genres. I have very little desire to branch out much further.
Much to my children's sorrow, I will not write middle grade or chapter books. It's not anything weird like a lack of respect for the genre. I am HUGELY appreciative of those categories because those are the books that make lifelong readers. Problem is, I didn't come into my own until high school, and I don't look back on the earlier years with any fondness. If someone said to me "Hey, we're going to make you twelve again and you can live your whole life over!" My response would be "No thanks, I'd rather choke on my own panicked vomit and die." Plus, quite honestly, I don't have the right voice for it.
There are people who can bridge from picture books all the way to adult and do it all well, but they are few and far between. It always makes me shake my head when I see writer friends/acquaintances who seem to jump on whatever the "it" genre is.
"MG is hot? I'm going to write that!"
"NA is the new thing. Sign me up."
Now, anyone who knows me knows I'm all about trying new things and stretching as a writer, but if the reason you're doing it is because it's popular, you're doing it for the wrong reasons. It's like dating the captain of the football team in high school even though he's a misogynistic creep who never bothers to comb his hair or brush his teeth. Hey, he's still football captain. Hello...popular.
Hello... lame... stupid... ridiculous. (Pick an adjective.)
So is chasing the "it" genre. By all means, if it calls to your muse and fits your voice, have at it. But if you're just doing it because it's popular...
Do you know why I write (some) New Adult? Because I love writing YA, and some of my YA has always nudged into the college arena (I was told at the time it was unsellable). I also write adult, but I've been told I have a "youthful" adult voice. (Appropriate since Julie means youthful.) So that sweet spot for me? It's 16-25. Yes, I've written older characters, but that (even with my adult stuff) is where I like to sit. I'm just lucky enough that it crosses three genres. I have very little desire to branch out much further.
Labels:
Adult,
genre chasing,
middle grade,
new adult,
next big thing,
writing,
young adult
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Young Adult...New Adult...Why Can't You Just Be an Adult?
The last question in the title I won't even bother responding to beyond this. I am an adult. I'm just not a grown-up. The end.
As for the rest (I'm about to show just how much of an adult I am, by the way)...
When I was growing up, there was no such thing as young adult. Yep, that long ago. I think the Sweet Valley High books were just coming into popularity (maybe), but by the time you're in high school I'm not sure those really cut it for reading material anymore. The point of this is kids jumped from reading kids' books to reading adult books. Age-appopriate had no meaning because the best a teenage reader could do was sift through the books and hope to find characters somewhere near their age. (Either that or so foreign that age didn't matter--I think this is one reason so many of us gravitated to sic-fi/fantasy early on.) Truly, the only book I can recall reading that would still fall under the YA heading today is The Outsiders.
I'm sure when someone first suggested YA there was some industry backlash. Where will we shelve them? Teens don't have money for books. All sorts of reasons to fight against it.
Then somewhere, some brave publisher decided to give it a try. And the books sold. Maybe not like hotcakes, but they sold. Over time this led to Harry Potter madness, Twilight insanity, and a few other huge sellers. YA wasn't some void--it was big money! (I can't find hard numbers, but I believe I've seen where YA as a genre is second only to romance in sales.)
There's a simple reason for this. YA is about firsts. First kiss, first love, first time, first car (er...firsts not in any particular order). A lot of things happen for the first time during those high school years. (Yes, some happen earlier or later, but on average, it's high school.) There were very few books that addressed those things. Things teenagers generally don't want to talk to their parents about too much. Teens needed YA fiction.
And the crazy part?
Adults needed to go back. Adult sales account for a very large portion of the YA market. Yes, part of it is well-written characters and blah blah blah, but the bigger part is wanting to "re-live" that time in our lives. For some of us (I'm probably in the minority) who loved high school, reading YA brings back a lot of good memories about the crazy shit we did. For others (who weren't so fond of the time), reading YA gives them a different (perhaps better) experience than what they lived through. It's very similar to the way a lot of women will return to romance novels after a bad break up. It's a reminder that there's good stuff out there somewhere.
Now New Adult is going through that same question phase that YA did. Do we need it? Who will it sell to? Is it just erotica for teens? Do we really want that?
The questions make me want to bash my head through a wall. Remember how I talked about the way teens used to jump from kids' books straight to adult? The advent of YA solved that...but there's still a hole. People (generally) don't go straight from high school graduation to a career or marriage and kids. There's college or first jobs or struggling as you move out of your parents' house. From eighteen to about twenty-five, there's a gaping chasm in fiction. Sure, you can sometimes find protagonists in the age bracket, but they aren't that common and there's no definitive place to look for them and even having characters of the right age doesn't guarantee a book that deals with those issues that plague "new adults."
Let me say it up front: New Adult is not erotica with teenagers. Period. Full stop. Books that are erotica with teenagers are erotica. Period. Full stop. It would be a very rare plot that is both erotica and deals with those new adult issues. (I can think of one that does, but it's a sub-plot in an adult book, so it doesn't really apply.)
So what is New Adult?
Young Adult is about firsts, but New Adult is about leaving. It's about exiting childhood, leaving that safety net as well as the one represented by parents. It's also about self-discovery. Those years after you leave home are when most people start to figure out who they really are without the rules of school or the rules of their family home. It's about responsibility on a level they may never have had to deal with before. In short, they're about becoming an adult in everything except age.
Does that include sex? Maybe. Probably. So does life though. And it is different than teen sex and different than married (or almost-married) sex. Self-discovery, remember? So yes, New Adult books will likely be sexier than their YA counterparts. That does not, however, make them erotica or even erotic romance. It just means sexier. Sort of like the girls in the 60s movies who go to school in their proper below-the-knee skirts just to roll them up once they get there and show a little leg. Sex in YA is (usually) fade-to-black or minimal details. Sex in New Adult is going to be more open--it's going to show a little more leg as it were.
Every time New Adult comes up on Twitter, I see people saying "we don't need it." Sure. We didn't need YA either. Generations of readers got by without it. That doesn't mean readers (and publishing) aren't better off for having it. It's taken self-published New Adult hits for publishers to sit up and take notice. People, readers, want new adult. They want to build a bridge over that gaping hole between YA and adult so they don't have to try to catapult across it.
And here's a crazy thought. Maybe, just maybe reading about the pitfalls of that time in life will help a few people from making the same mistakes the previous generation (or two) did. I know. Books don't ever teach people anything. Right?
Labels:
erotica with teenagers,
new adult,
publishing,
sex in new adult,
Sex in YA,
sex in young adult,
young adult
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
New Year, New Attitude
I've been in a bit of a funk over the state of YA within digital publishing for a while now. Truth is, YA is tough to sell digitally as most teens don't read that way, which means they also don't look for books from the digital presses (even if they're available in print).
I know, I know, what about Amanda Hocking (and a few others)? Yes, the success stories exist, but they are still the exception, not the norm.
However, a couple publishers are changing the game and getting their books into stores (which makes a HUGE difference when selling to a teen audience). So, I'm working on finding my way into that niche. I have a couple projects that are definite maybes. In fact, one has received a revise and resubmit from one of those game-changers. That's definitely on the agenda for this year--as soon as I can get to it.
You have all been incredibly patient with me in waiting for the next PRT book, and I promise it WILL happen. It's written and just waiting for the stars to align. The hope is to have all five books out by the end of 2015. I know it's a long wait (believe me, I know), but I hope you'll stick around for it.
I also hope if that you'll keep your fingers crossed regarding the other project, and that you'll be willing to follow me to a different world. One filled with supernatural creatures and romance and adventure.
A number of shark species will drown if they stop swimming. I try to look at writing that way. Even if you don't see my fin cutting through the water, I'm still going. Sometimes the hunt for dinner just takes longer than others. <3
I know, I know, what about Amanda Hocking (and a few others)? Yes, the success stories exist, but they are still the exception, not the norm.
However, a couple publishers are changing the game and getting their books into stores (which makes a HUGE difference when selling to a teen audience). So, I'm working on finding my way into that niche. I have a couple projects that are definite maybes. In fact, one has received a revise and resubmit from one of those game-changers. That's definitely on the agenda for this year--as soon as I can get to it.
You have all been incredibly patient with me in waiting for the next PRT book, and I promise it WILL happen. It's written and just waiting for the stars to align. The hope is to have all five books out by the end of 2015. I know it's a long wait (believe me, I know), but I hope you'll stick around for it.
I also hope if that you'll keep your fingers crossed regarding the other project, and that you'll be willing to follow me to a different world. One filled with supernatural creatures and romance and adventure.
A number of shark species will drown if they stop swimming. I try to look at writing that way. Even if you don't see my fin cutting through the water, I'm still going. Sometimes the hunt for dinner just takes longer than others. <3
Labels:
Digital publishing,
new projects,
PRT,
YA
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Guest: J.A. Campbell and Summer Break Blues
Please welcome the brilliant and wonderful J.A. Campbell to the blog today. Her new release, Summer Break Blues, just came out and you should definitely pick up a copy ASAP! Read on and check out the vampire-y goodness :)
Thank you all for joining me in celebrating the book release
of my second young adult urban fantasy, Summer Break Blues. This is the sequel
to Senior Year Bites and picks up a few months after it left off with Meg’s
graduation from high school.
Vampires are dead… no one is reading them now… people have
moved on. That’s what you hear from the industry “professionals.” HAHAHAHAAH I
say. True Blood anyone? Vampire Diaries? Yep, we’ve moved on… into more
vampires.
People have always had a fascination with vampires, from the
myths in the Balkins about vampire pumpkins, to almost every other culture that
has had some sort of blood drinking being. I don’t see that going away just
because a few professionals say so. Humans have been fascinated by the concept
for centuries. A few decades of “lots of vampire books,” certainly aren’t going
to change that. To me it has just added fuel to the interest.
That being said, these days it seems like writing vampire
fiction as a newbie makes you look like you’re just jumping on the bandwagon.
Yep, that’s me… bandwagon girl… except I started writing vampire fiction back
in, oh… 2000 I think. Way back when the Anita Blake series was one of my
favorite reads and only a few of them were published. LKH and Kelley Armstrong
certainly inspired me in my love of Urban Fantasy, before it was a booming
genre, but I liked vampires before that too.
I think, just like any other popular genre, there is room
for many more stories. Everyone has their own spin on things. Three of us at
Decadent just published young adult urban fantasies with vampires, werewolves
and all sorts of other supernatural creatures in them, and they are quite
different. And Decadent obviously thought there was room for all of our
stories. I agree.
What do you think? Are vampires dead? Or Undead as it were.
Do we have room for more stories?
Blurb:
Meg managed to survive her senior year of high school as a
vampire, and now she’s looking forward to a relaxing summer with her friends
before trying to tackle college. Unfortunately, some unfinished business from
the previous year rears its ugly head and Meg is forced to deal with the Sidhe
who are distinctly unhappy that she killed one of their kind last winter. Then
Ann’s parents vanish while they are on their annual summer vacation in Maine
and it’s up to Meg and the rest of the gang to come to the rescue. Though she
is still trying to figure out who, and what she has become, Meg and her friends
feel they are up to the challenge. That is until things really start to fall apart.
Buy Links:
Author Bio:
Julie writes
fantasy novels. When she’s not out riding her horse, she can usually be found
sitting in front of her computer with a cat on her lap and her dog at her
side. www.writerjacampbell.com.
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Ranty-pants Time: Adults of the World, You're the Grown Ups
I know this is a blog for my young adult books, but I'm fairly certain a lot of parents read it too, so I hope the teens out there will forgive me for addressing the adults today. I think when I'm done, we can all agree it needs to be said, and said loudly.
Yesterday, while poking around Facebook, I came upon a post from someone that kind of set me off. You see, this guy's birthday (he's in his late 40s) happens to fall on Halloween. Cool, right? It totally is, unless you're his teenage kid and dear old dad decides to throw himself a birthday party on Halloween night. The teenager (who apparently doesn't live with his dad) decided he'd rather spend the night with his own friends and the guy was pissed. After all, it was his birthday and having his new wife and kids at his party was "the only thing he wanted."
Dude... grow up.
I'm sorry, but just no. So many, many shades of no. You are an adult and obviously no one has informed you that the world stopped revolving around you sometime about your tenth birthday. You see, when you hit the pre-teen years (sometimes earlier), you are no longer a cute precocious little thing everyone feels the need to pander to. That's about the time when reality strikes and you have to share the world with everyone else who lives in it.
The worst part is the dozen or so years of limbo in there where your brain says you're still the center of the universe but everyone else just laughs. It takes a while to come to terms with that, but in theory, it's supposed to happen around adulthood.
So now you're an adult and your birthday falls on a major holiday? Great. Go to the bar and try to get free beer out of the deal. Otherwise, don't expect everyone else to drop their plans to pay homage to you. Now, if you're known for throwing kick-ass parties of epic proportions, you might be able to get your friends to schedule you in because "Hey! Grown-up time!" But if you're looking for your kids (more specifically, your teenage kids) to say "Of course I'd rather spend time at your place with all of your friends on one of the few holidays that aren't more or less required family participation..." Good luck.
No, seriously. Good luck with that. If you have a fantastic relationship with your kids that you've nurtured since they were young, you might pull it off. Maybe. You have a better chance if you offer to include their friends so they aren't surrounded by "old people." (And don't trust that cousins or your friends' kids are going to be their friends. That's both arrogant and stupid. Get over it.) But your smarter move? That'd be to plan your party for a day other than your actual birthday/holiday. I know, I know, that's your day, but really, you can pretend you turn however old a day or two or even a week earlier or later. People will play along, I promise.
If you can't do that, you obviously don't remember what it was like to be a kid (other than that whole world-revolves-around-me crap). For kids, and especially teenagers, friends are their life. They have school (that tells them what to do and think), they have home (where parents tell them what to do and think), and maybe a job (where someone tells them what to do and think). The only place they just get to be is with their friends. That's important. That's how people learn and grow as human beings. (More than once, my friends saved my life in high school. Yes, they are that important.) Also, never assume you know what's going on in your teen's life. Odds are, you don't. There might be a break-up on the horizon or a friend contemplating suicide or the possibility of finally getting a chance with the girl/boy who will end up their partner for life.
There were comments from people saying the kid in question should have shown respect for his father by giving up the time with his friends blah blah blah. Personal opinion, in this instance the respect should have come from the adult and he should have talked to the kid about the fact that he wanted to do this party on a holiday. I'm pretty sure if said kid planned a date or party for say... Christmas or Thanksgiving, it wouldn't go over so well with the parents.
Adults need to learn to both grow up and get over the I'm-the-center-of-the-universe mentality while at the same time remembering what it was like to be young. You have to be an adult without being so old that you're out of touch. It's a sucky job, but it's what we take on when we become parents. It's kind of funny that for those first ten years or so when a parent allows their kid to be the center of the world, they are helping to build the kind of person the kid will become. Those next dozen or so years? That's when the kid becomes their own person. That's a battle parents fight at their own peril because every choice they make (or force on their kid) has consequences and shapes the landscape of their parent-child relationship when that kid becomes an adult and has children of their own.
So parents, please help your teen become their own person. Encourage them to make thoughtful choices, but don't condemn them when you disagree. Be the adult. Be the guide. And be wise enough to understand they might not always do what you want and that's okay because they aren't you. Also? If it turns out they were wrong and their choice bites them in the ass, be there to help them pick up the pieces. It might mean that next time they'll listen closer to you. And if they don't... it's still okay.
*Note: A message from the person in question said the teen had a voice in when the party happened, so that is an issue within this other stuff. However, the point of the post remains the same with regard to dealing with teenagers as the adult parent. Sometimes being the grown up sucks. Sometimes being the teen sucks. Sometimes they suck together. Life's messed like that.*
Also, to those of you doing NaNoWriMo this month, I wish you words of awesomeness :)
Yesterday, while poking around Facebook, I came upon a post from someone that kind of set me off. You see, this guy's birthday (he's in his late 40s) happens to fall on Halloween. Cool, right? It totally is, unless you're his teenage kid and dear old dad decides to throw himself a birthday party on Halloween night. The teenager (who apparently doesn't live with his dad) decided he'd rather spend the night with his own friends and the guy was pissed. After all, it was his birthday and having his new wife and kids at his party was "the only thing he wanted."
Dude... grow up.
I'm sorry, but just no. So many, many shades of no. You are an adult and obviously no one has informed you that the world stopped revolving around you sometime about your tenth birthday. You see, when you hit the pre-teen years (sometimes earlier), you are no longer a cute precocious little thing everyone feels the need to pander to. That's about the time when reality strikes and you have to share the world with everyone else who lives in it.
The worst part is the dozen or so years of limbo in there where your brain says you're still the center of the universe but everyone else just laughs. It takes a while to come to terms with that, but in theory, it's supposed to happen around adulthood.
So now you're an adult and your birthday falls on a major holiday? Great. Go to the bar and try to get free beer out of the deal. Otherwise, don't expect everyone else to drop their plans to pay homage to you. Now, if you're known for throwing kick-ass parties of epic proportions, you might be able to get your friends to schedule you in because "Hey! Grown-up time!" But if you're looking for your kids (more specifically, your teenage kids) to say "Of course I'd rather spend time at your place with all of your friends on one of the few holidays that aren't more or less required family participation..." Good luck.
No, seriously. Good luck with that. If you have a fantastic relationship with your kids that you've nurtured since they were young, you might pull it off. Maybe. You have a better chance if you offer to include their friends so they aren't surrounded by "old people." (And don't trust that cousins or your friends' kids are going to be their friends. That's both arrogant and stupid. Get over it.) But your smarter move? That'd be to plan your party for a day other than your actual birthday/holiday. I know, I know, that's your day, but really, you can pretend you turn however old a day or two or even a week earlier or later. People will play along, I promise.
If you can't do that, you obviously don't remember what it was like to be a kid (other than that whole world-revolves-around-me crap). For kids, and especially teenagers, friends are their life. They have school (that tells them what to do and think), they have home (where parents tell them what to do and think), and maybe a job (where someone tells them what to do and think). The only place they just get to be is with their friends. That's important. That's how people learn and grow as human beings. (More than once, my friends saved my life in high school. Yes, they are that important.) Also, never assume you know what's going on in your teen's life. Odds are, you don't. There might be a break-up on the horizon or a friend contemplating suicide or the possibility of finally getting a chance with the girl/boy who will end up their partner for life.
There were comments from people saying the kid in question should have shown respect for his father by giving up the time with his friends blah blah blah. Personal opinion, in this instance the respect should have come from the adult and he should have talked to the kid about the fact that he wanted to do this party on a holiday. I'm pretty sure if said kid planned a date or party for say... Christmas or Thanksgiving, it wouldn't go over so well with the parents.
Adults need to learn to both grow up and get over the I'm-the-center-of-the-universe mentality while at the same time remembering what it was like to be young. You have to be an adult without being so old that you're out of touch. It's a sucky job, but it's what we take on when we become parents. It's kind of funny that for those first ten years or so when a parent allows their kid to be the center of the world, they are helping to build the kind of person the kid will become. Those next dozen or so years? That's when the kid becomes their own person. That's a battle parents fight at their own peril because every choice they make (or force on their kid) has consequences and shapes the landscape of their parent-child relationship when that kid becomes an adult and has children of their own.
So parents, please help your teen become their own person. Encourage them to make thoughtful choices, but don't condemn them when you disagree. Be the adult. Be the guide. And be wise enough to understand they might not always do what you want and that's okay because they aren't you. Also? If it turns out they were wrong and their choice bites them in the ass, be there to help them pick up the pieces. It might mean that next time they'll listen closer to you. And if they don't... it's still okay.
*Note: A message from the person in question said the teen had a voice in when the party happened, so that is an issue within this other stuff. However, the point of the post remains the same with regard to dealing with teenagers as the adult parent. Sometimes being the grown up sucks. Sometimes being the teen sucks. Sometimes they suck together. Life's messed like that.*
Also, to those of you doing NaNoWriMo this month, I wish you words of awesomeness :)
Labels:
Adult,
birthday,
center-of-the-universe syndrome,
getting old,
growing up,
selfishness,
Teens
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
First Thursday, Second Thursday... I Miss YA
The new schedule kind of threw me and I missed blogging last week. Not sure if I should just officially make it the second Thursday or what. But I do promise to blog once a month, on a Thursday. Promise-promise. Pinky-swear. All that.
The other me has been busy. Like crazy-busy. I've been working on book after book after book, but all of them have been for the adult market. And I really miss YA.
There are still some projects in the works and on submission, but writing of YA has been on hold because of the adult projects. As much as I love writing romance and stuff for an older market, there's this pull to the world of teenagers and first loves and beginnings. I want to write about things that are new, not just to me and the reader, but to the characters. New love, first kisses, new worlds.
So, I think I'm going to--in my questionable spare time--toy with that YA contemporary suspense I started a while ago. I think I need to. I need to believe in new beginnings again, and that's something I've only ever really felt with YA.
The other me has been busy. Like crazy-busy. I've been working on book after book after book, but all of them have been for the adult market. And I really miss YA.
There are still some projects in the works and on submission, but writing of YA has been on hold because of the adult projects. As much as I love writing romance and stuff for an older market, there's this pull to the world of teenagers and first loves and beginnings. I want to write about things that are new, not just to me and the reader, but to the characters. New love, first kisses, new worlds.
So, I think I'm going to--in my questionable spare time--toy with that YA contemporary suspense I started a while ago. I think I need to. I need to believe in new beginnings again, and that's something I've only ever really felt with YA.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Temporary Changes
I've kind of been hinting at this for a while now, but I'm finally having to implement things. I am temporarily putting the blog on semi-hiatus. (How's that for non-committal?) Basically, things have gotten really busy for me and I can't commit to blogging every week here for the time being.
However...
I'm not going to shut up completely. (Like you thought I could do that. Ha!)
This should have gone up last week but, life being as it is, I was a bit overwhelmed last week and it got pushed back. So... officially, I'm only going to be blogging here the first Thursday of the month. I might do it more often than that, but it'll be hit or miss. Additionally, if I have news, I will be sure to share.
I don't plan for this to be a permanent change, but for the time being it's a necessary one.
As for today, I'm off to get my hair done (finally!) and then I have to spend more time being adult-me. And then I have to be mom-me. Hopefully soon I'll get to be YA-me again.
In the meantime, I've been pondering Alice in Wonderland a lot lately and this video always reminds me of a darker version. We'll see if all those thoughts manage to converge into something. Enjoy!
However...
I'm not going to shut up completely. (Like you thought I could do that. Ha!)
This should have gone up last week but, life being as it is, I was a bit overwhelmed last week and it got pushed back. So... officially, I'm only going to be blogging here the first Thursday of the month. I might do it more often than that, but it'll be hit or miss. Additionally, if I have news, I will be sure to share.
I don't plan for this to be a permanent change, but for the time being it's a necessary one.
As for today, I'm off to get my hair done (finally!) and then I have to spend more time being adult-me. And then I have to be mom-me. Hopefully soon I'll get to be YA-me again.
In the meantime, I've been pondering Alice in Wonderland a lot lately and this video always reminds me of a darker version. We'll see if all those thoughts manage to converge into something. Enjoy!
Labels:
alice in wonderland,
blogging changes,
life,
paramore
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Meet Me in Chicago!
I am on the train to ChiCon (or getting ready to get on the train... or already in Chicago). Either way, it's ChiCon and I'll be there. If you'll be there too, find me...
Saturday 10:30-noon (in Wrigley): Why I Love My Editor panel
Saturday 7-7:30 (in Addams): Reading (definitely my adult urban fantasty Kiss of Death, possibly a bit of something else if there's time and dependent on the age of the audience, I might do Pretty Souls)
Sunday 5-6:30 (in Toronto): Literary Beers with Seleste deLaney (where I'll talk magic, urban fantasy, corsets, steampunk, sex, and romance--and there will be beer--since there's beer, I'm assuming this is a 21 and over event)
Otherwise, I'll be bopping around like my normal half-awake-half-crazy self. Feel free to stop me to say hi :)
Otherwise, I'll be bopping around like my normal half-awake-half-crazy self. Feel free to stop me to say hi :)
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